Look In the Mirror

One thing I hope to accomplish while on this journey is the confidence to do what I want and be what I want. I want to show younger girls that even if you aren't a size 2 you are still beautiful and you can be anything you aspire to be. 

Society has a habit of isolating people of a certain size. While I have learned to accept that I will be looked at differently based on my size , it breaks my heart to see young girls binge eating for comfort because they are isolated and because they don't feel beautiful by societies standards. 

Nothing eats at me more than to see a young girl sitting by herself at a table and forcing mass amounts of food into her mouth, one right after the other because it is the only comfort that she will get. It doesn't just have to be at a table, it may be in a room, huddled in the corner; stashing food under the bed, in drawers, etc. It is not that she is not loved, it is because society has shown her that the only thing that will never turn its back on her is food. 

As a child, I had the habit of eating things because they were there (I have referenced this in a previous post). I would eat foods because they were there. It wasn't because I was hungry it was because I saw food as my friend, my friend who wouldn't turn its back on me. It's not that I was not active as a child (I loved to ride my bike) it is just that when I got bored, my friend food was always there for me.

My pediatrician tried to help me with my eating habits. She would show me my chart and explain that girls of my age should be in the "curve" instead, I was the outlier, I sat way (and I do mean way) outside of the curve. My pediatrician (one of the sweetest people in the world) recommend to my mother and I that I start eating weight watchers from time to time, eat yogurt instead of ice cream, limit bread to once per meal (example - one roll at dinner instead of two). Each of her suggestions are things that I have tried in the past but it wasn't until I really buckled down that I saw the value and importance in these suggestions. 

Back then, how did you tell a pre-teen / teen that she had an eating problem? You said it in the nicest way possible, just as my pediatrician did. That was during a time when kids weren't cruel but all of that has changed now. How do you tell a pre-teen / teen that they have an eating problem now without hurting their feelings or making them feel like a bigger social outcast?

I am not on this journey to make people notice me, I am on this journey to improve my life and ultimately feel better about myself; but in the process, if I can inspire someone younger (or older) than me to take a look at themselves in the mirror and see how beautiful they are based on their character or personality, then I am fine with that.