Whoever said losing weight was easy was telling a lie. It is far from easy and requires you to work hard and dedicate yourself to what you are working towards. This entire time I have been telling myself that I am working towards a healthier me and that is my goal. Yes, I am still focusing on that number I want to see but in the process I am trying to find myself and discover what does and doesn't work for me.
I want to feel good about myself in the process of this journey but I know it is going to take a lot of work. At this point on my journey, I wish I could say I have lost 30 or more pounds but I do have the honor of saying I have lost 16, which is definitely an accomplishment for me on this journey.
I know that there are things that I still have to work on and there are sacrifices that I have to make, but I don't have to do it all at once. I suppose you could say losing weight is frustrating. I take that back, it is frustrating, plain and simple. You have to get in the right frame of mind and if you aren't ready to do such, then you won't successful when it comes to losing weight.
I am not saying that to discourage anyone who is reading this from following their weight loss dreams, but one thing I realized prior to this year is that no matter how much I told myself I was ready to lose weight, I wasn't. I focused too much on what society thought I should look like and that is why my goal was never attainable and that is why I failed over and over again.
Last year when I started a weight loss journey (with the help of LoseIt!) I was able to lose 30 pounds from January to April, just by watching what I ate. This year I have only lost 16 in the same amount of time. It makes me wonder what is wrong with me? What am I doing differently this year than I did last year?
One thing I have yet to get under control is whether or not I should eat back my exercise calories. I try not to mainly because I have eaten all of my calories for the day and those exercise ones are just a cushion. But, that is the only thing that I am doing differently; this time around I am exercising, whereas I wasn't last year.
Maybe that is the reason that I haven't dropped those additional 14 pounds that I dropped last year. Maybe I have been eating too many or too few calories (especially when it comes to my exercise calories) or maybe I haven't been accurately measuring everything that I have consumed (prior to last week I rarely logged condiments or drinks). It's small calories that really add up and some of the foods and drinks you would think wouldn't have a lot of calories actually do, and it can be really surprising.
I don't know what is different this year than last year other than the exercise calories. I am doing the same thing, yet everything is happening in slow motion, really slow motion. In the end, I can say that my exercise calories are the biggest thing bothering me on this weight loss journey, do I eat them or don't I eat them; that is the main question that I haven't been able to answer.